Let me save you.
Top 10 Things to Do with Too Much Zucchini
10. Store your zucchini in the refrigerator. Sell your house. Do not return to that house. Ever.
9. Put the zucchini in the pocket of your jeans. Accidentally run your jeans through the washing machine. Oops.
8. Invite everyone you know to a zucchini potluck. Before your friends arrive, go to a movie. Then head to a bar. Then find new friends.
7. Shave your zucchini into slivers. Hide the slivers between the pages of your books. Book sale!
6. Dress your zucchini in a bear suit. Call animal control.
5. Move to a country where zucchini is the currency. Spend all your zucchini on diamonds. Shiny!
4. Use your zucchini as a baseball bat. Make sure the ball is bigger than the zucchini. Make sure the ball is heavier than the zucchini. Swing for the fences.
3. Rob a bank. Put the money in a white bag with red polka dots. Put all your zucchini in an identical bag. Call the police tip line. Abscond with the cash.
2. Develop a reality show where hot singles compete to see who can eat the most zucchini. When Bravo buys the rights, leave Earth.
1. And the number one thing to do when you have too much zucchini: imagine how the zucchini feels. It's probably not too fond of you either.